Build It Before You Need It
Why ageing well means designing the community you’ll rely on, before it’s too late.
The Village That Didn’t Wait
In 2001, a group of neighbours in Boston’s Beacon Hill neighbourhood did something quietly revolutionary. They didn’t want to move into aged care. They didn’t want to rely on their adult children. And they didn’t want to pretend they could go it alone.
So they created their own alternative.
Beacon Hill Village was born not out of crisis, but out of foresight. A group of older adults pooled their ideas, their contacts, and their willingness to organise. They built a community that would support them to live independently for longer, with social events, transport help, vetted contractors, and meaningful connection.
No institution handed it to them. No program was waiting. They simply decided they would build what they needed rather than hope someone else would do it for them.
Because of that choice, the model caught on. Today, there are hundreds of “Villages” all over the world, each shaped by the people who live there. All because a few people decided not to wait.
I’ve Seen It. And It Works.
I’ve visited several of these villages. And every time I walk away with the same thought: this is what ageing should look like. They are vibrant. Collaborative. Inclusive. And fun.
“It didn’t feel like aged care. It felt like community.”
What struck me most wasn’t the services on offer, though those were impressive. It was the energy. The sense that people weren’t being looked after. They were looking out for each other. No pity. No bureaucracy. Just a bunch of people choosing to grow older, together.
It didn’t feel like aged care. It felt like community.
The Data Backs It Up
What Beacon Hill Village understood intuitively, science has now confirmed.
Strong social networks significantly reduce the risk of dementia, depression, heart disease, and premature death. In fact, one meta-analysis found that loneliness can be as harmful to your health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
The Harvard Study of Adult Development, which has followed people for more than 80 years, found that close relationships are the best predictor of ageing well. Not income. Not exercise. Not even genetics. Just the simple act of being known and being loved.
But those relationships don’t appear by magic. They are cultivated. Nurtured. Designed.
Community Is a Skill, Not a Windfall
There’s a myth that the best communities just happen. That some people get lucky with their street or their church or their weekly catch-ups, and the rest of us are left watching from the sidelines.
“If you want community when you're 80, the work starts in your 40s or 50s. Or today.”
But the truth is, the people who have strong community later in life almost always did something about it earlier on.
They made the effort. They joined the group. They asked the neighbour if they wanted to grab a coffee. They hosted a movie night or a walking group or a lunch for whoever was around.
They didn’t wait for permission. They didn’t need a formal structure. They just started.
My Own Reminder
I joined a local soccer team a while back. I was out of shape, overcommitted, and the idea of making small talk with strangers gave me mild dread. But I did it anyway.
At first it was just something to do on a weeknight. Now, years later, it’s a community. The kind that checks in if someone goes quiet. The kind that shows up when life gets hard.
I didn’t fall into that. I built it. Slowly. Imperfectly. Awkwardly. But I built it.
And that’s the real lesson here.
Want It? Make It.
If you want community when you're 80, the work starts in your 40s or 50s. Or today.
You don’t need a perfect plan. You just need to act.
Start a monthly dinner club.
Organise a shared garden.
Say hello to your neighbours and mean it.
Join something, even if you’re nervous.
Or do what the Beacon Hill crew did: bring people together and build something that lasts.
Because when things get hard, and they will, you’ll want people who know your story. People who have seen you laugh, stumble, show up, and grow. People who will walk beside you, not out of obligation, but out of habit and history.
The Future Belongs to the Builders
We talk a lot about ageing with dignity. But dignity isn’t just about avoiding decline. It’s about ownership. And that means recognising that the kind of old age you want will depend on the kind of community you build long before you get there.
“The kind of old age you want will depend
on the kind of community you build long before you get there.”
So pick something. Anything. Send the message. Make the plan. Knock on the door.
You don’t need to wait for someone to save you from loneliness. You just need to decide that the life you want later on starts with the action you take right now.